Graduating college and walking on stage was a BIG deal for me. I didn’t get the opportunity to do it in High School because I dropped out in 9th grade.
Q: Why did I drop out?
Most people would assume it was because I was a pregnant teenager. That assumption would be incorrect.
A: I dropped out of High School even before I was pregnant primarily because of my “panic disorder.” I would experience full blown out panic attacks for no real apparent reason. My lips would get tingly, I would start to hyperventilate, felt dizzy, and experience the fight or flight response. (I didn’t know at the time what was happening to me.)
In 9th grade is when my panic disorder was at it’s worst. I challenged myself every morning to attend school. I wanted to participate in sports, I wanted to make new friendships, I wanted to do well in class, I just could not control my thoughts at that point in time. I was not able to focus on the positive things. Now realizing as I remember that time in my life, I was only focusing on the negatives.
I would walk in the building and roughly 20-30 minutes later, I was overwhelmed by the crowd, the noise, the people staring at me, many conversations happening at once and I felt like I was losing my mind. I would start to feel lightheaded, sweat, feel my face get hot, cry, and immediately run back home.
My mom was always working so she did not know I was skipping school (until she was mailed a citation, sorry about that Mom!) My father was not around much after my mother left him and his other 2 wives.
Eventually my mother and I discussed some options for these feelings that I was experiencing. You see… meditation, essential oils, reiki, and all these other natural remedies were not introduced to me as a teenager. Fourteen years ago, these other options were not in my mother’s awareness therefore they were not taught to me, and that’s okay – because it was part of my growth and spiritual awakening. Drugs and therapists became my life until my early twenties until “I” learned HOW to gain control of my thoughts to improve my life. I studied anxiety, fear and these negative thoughts. I was determined to find a way to live this life anxiety-free.
My fear was transformed into FAITH and I’ve been killin’ it ever since! Here are a few pictures of me conquering my deepest fear of flying!
So how did I do it? How did I gain control over my thoughts to control my anxiety? It wasn’t a walk in the park, nor was it cake baby! It took some soul work. Some of my soul work for anxiety is listed below. Use this list to help you manage your anxiety a more natural way.
- Find mentors who you trust and feel connected to and follow them. Talk to them.
- Read, read and read some more. The more you are aware on how common these feelings are, the more comforted it feels because you don’t feel “as alone.” I recommend reading or listening to the book, Dare: The New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks Fast.
- Know your worth. Love yourself and have confidence. All can be done through guided mediations, vision boards, affirmations, and practicing gratitude daily. I still use my guided mediations. PRO TIP: Record yourself chanting your affirmations and listen to the recording every single day.
- Trust. The most important soul work will be feeling connected to God and becoming realigned to who you truly are. Being in full alignment with yourself and God relieves anxiety. Always pray.
- Exercise. Everyone knows the many health benefits of exercise, but did you know exercise is extremely important for your mental health too?
- Diffuse essential oils or wear them. Lavender and Serenity blend essential oil is my favorite.
- Find time to enjoy the outdoors — without distractions. NO PHONE! You must disconnect to reconnect. <3
- Get enough sleep. For Moms this one can be tough, though possible! Our bodies need adequate rest to properly function. Listen to your body.
- Do something you love. Find your passion in life. Whatever fills your heart and soul is what you should be doing. Do more of it.
- Eat how you want to feel. If you eat garbage you will feel like garbage. If you eat cleaner and better, you will naturally feel better.
I don’t believe anxiety is forever. I feel when you are fully aligned your thoughts will be mastered and panic goes away. When you feel safe, guided and have surrendered yourself to good, the panic lessens. The power of positivity kills those false negative beliefs.
I do feel that you’ll always be given circumstances that will help you grow and become stronger minded. Those experiences up-level your vibration (depending on how you deal with them.)
Managing anxiety is simply managing your thoughts. When you are in tune with how your thought patterns work, and how foods effects this, you’ll be able to master your anxiety too! <3
P.S: Come hang out with me in the Facebook community, Faith to freedom.